Cancer Fighters Thrive is a quarterly print and online magazine bringing readers practical, innovative and inspirational information about cancer treatment and survivorship.
Issue link: http://cancerfightersthrive.epubxp.com/i/197379
YOUNG ADULTS CALL IT LIKE IT IS: YOUNG ADULTS FACE CANCER Coping with a Loss of Independence By Alli Ward I ndependence is a funny thing: You often don't realize how important it is until you lose it. At 35 years old, I was the typical single professional who considered the world my oyster. I had fnally reached a place in my career where I had a bit more control over my job, and I spent my free time hiking, camping, traveling and mainly just enjoying life. Then one day I was diagnosed with cancer. Within a few months, I was not only dealing with the physical and emotional side effects of cancer—I was suddenly dependent on others for many of my everyday needs. I needed help with grocery shopping, cleaning, driving to appointments, fxing meals and many diagnosis, I moved back in with my parents. I was lucky; I had a very supportive group of friends and a family that lived nearby and was always able to help. This transition from self-suffciency to dependency was extremely diffcult, and it took an emotional toll. At a time in my life when I felt that I should be going out with friends or starting a family, I was dealing with a life-threatening disease over which I had little or no control. After living alone for 13 years, it was strange to be living with my parents again. It felt like a return to childhood: I had to request permission to go out; and since I did not drive, I needed to ask someone to take me. At one point I had to ask my parents for money to help cover my medical bills and daily on one's body or the emotional effects and the ways it changes one's life. other necessary tasks. Asking for help was not something I did very well. Prior to the diagnosis, I was usually the caregiver, so even asking a friend to pick up something at a grocery store seemed like an imposition and an indication that I was no longer in control of my own life. A short time later, I found myself in need of even more help. I was no longer working, could not drive and could no longer live alone. Three years after the expenses. After working for years to cultivate independence and self-suffciency, I felt like a failure. It is not uncommon for young adults who are single to move in with family members. Young adult survivors with children, however, also often need to depend on family and friends to help care for their children. It leads me to sometimes wonder what is harder about having cancer: the physical impact it has cancer thrivor. In 2009 she decided to stop conventional treatment and focus on quality of life. Alli strives to live fully while dealing with long-term side effects of the disease. Alli is the VP of Programs for Stupid Cancer, an organization dedicated to supporting those affected by young adult cancer. cfthrive.com Finding ways to cope with the loss of independence is essential. Expressing concerns and feelings with family, friends and caregivers and brainstorming ways to alleviate some of the sense of dependence can be helpful. Because I was housebound much of the time, we planned outings with other friends not only to give me time out of the house but to give my family a break, as well. I also found journaling and blogging to be extremely helpful. It gave me an outlet to express my feelings, and sometimes just writing the feelings on paper helped release some of the anxiety. Alli Ward is a six-year stage IV ovarian winter 2013 | cancer fighters thrive 43